Thursday, March 09, 2006

"you have got to crawl before you walk"......but, i'm tired of crawling

my advisor shared this analogy with me during our first meeting:

"...just like a vacuum, you are a sucker right now. sucking up all kinds of information whether relevant or irrelevant. in this process, you will learn a lot of new things and find certain things that interest you. as you progress along your phd, will start to become a blower similar to a fan. you will notice this change as you start to speak more and more of your thoughts and ideas will be coming out of your mouth instead of just repeating what you have read or learned from other places. eventually, you will become a complete blower of information as you near the end of your journey."

this a very simple but accurate description that i thought/think is very good. it definitely made me think a bit. anybody that knows me can tell you that i always put an extreme amount of pressure on myself not only to perform, but be the BEST performer. the title of this post describes how i feel at times. i understand the situation that i am in, but for some reason, i have this notion/feeling that i need to be blowing already. most times i can convince myself that it is not time yet, but other times i feel like i am behind. i think that my haste to become a blower may stem from a bit of uncertainty of whether or not i am smart enough or capable of becoming a blower. matter of fact.........i know this is the reason why i am in a hurry. being in an academic environment surrounded by established researchers can be a gift and a curse. so many resources to tap into, but so many people that are miles ahead can be intimidating for a young phd student.

today, i made some good progress on my fpga design and finally picked up where i left off with my short-range location system. i am hoping to have this finished by the end of apil at the latest.


p.s. - check out Microsoft's new mobile device: http://www.origamiproject.com/3/

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