Tuesday, August 04, 2009

what are you on track for?

whether to make sure you stay on task to complete your day's to-do list or to make sure you are doing the right thing to achieve larger goals, this is a great question to ask of yourself throughout the day. i find it particularly useful to ask this first thing in the morning. this has proven full proof in getting me up out of bed each day.

this question, followed by a morning workout, followed by doing is the essential recipe for guaranteed productive days.

these days, i am doing all i can to make sure i can finish and submit my dissertation before the end of the year. i ran into a minor (at least what i hope is a minor) hiccup that could potentially add much more work before i would be able to submit. let's pray that it is minor and does not cause any major delay. having almost come full circle with this whole phd thing, the feeling is one of slight disappointment. i think too often, we get in our heads that reaching a certain level of achievement will be similar to walking into a totally different existence overnight. most times, it is not like this. and now, i see this with my phd. it's not to say that i am not happy about it all, just that i 'expected' the feeling to be totally different than what it is. at the heart of it all, we are who we are and no accolade will change that or our existence. i guess what i am trying to explain is kind of along the lines of the phrase, 'the grass is always greener on the other side,'; meaning that we desire what we don't have, most times, for the simple fact that we do not have it and think we want/need it. too, we concoct an idea of what we don't have that is much greater than the idea of the thing we don't have actually merits. that is, we give it more value than it actually is worth in a sense.

why do we do this? hmmm, good question. i don't know. maybe this is a false sense of motivation to achieve for some. or maybe, it is a reason for underachievers to feel content in not trying (because the thing is too 'great' for them to possibly achieve in their minds).

maybe i have it all wrong. maybe the feeling of disappointment in the first place is really a manifestation of the realization that i have yet more mountain to climb, and this prevents me from 'enjoying' the moment. i guess this is the way it should be right!?!?! we are to embrace and enjoy the journey (as it is normally a larger portion of our time and energy) and NOT the goal (as this is only a short period of time....a few hours, a day maybe, or some longer period of time but NOT indefinitely). is this the curse of being driven? is this the challenge of understanding how to manage ambition? i think so. to a certain extent, happiness comes from feeling good about what you have done/accomplished. BUT, for some, the happiness comes from DOING more. the challenge is where some get their happiness and enjoyment.


Blogger MoHi said...

Preach! haha. I could not agree more but I think the lack of enthuse enjoyment is b/c when you first set a goal it seems far away and almost impossible. But as you go through the process, you get to a point where the goal is now expected. The magic is gone as your experiences of getting it done has showed you this is what you suppose to do. Shannon would always ask me, why you never celebrate about the things you have accomplished. Most people will love to do the things you have done in such a short time. It's because I have prepared for it for so long, it is no longer a surprise to me. It has now become an expectation.

4:57 AM  

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